Slumming has never looked so good

Okay, so I go out last night to meet C at a club.  And who is there but an ex.  No biggie.  But he heads straight for me and starts talking like we are old friends.  Okay, not so much.  I'm starting to think, shit what did  I ever see in this guy.  Oh, right.  That.  Because honestly, that is what I remember.  Fuck, how shallow am I?  Yeah, alright.  But maybe I've grown since then.  LOL.

Anyway, I give him a bit of small talk, then see arrives and I shake him off.  Had a pretty good time... actually a VERY good time, until I see the ex again.  He is with a group of people I know, some I like, some are dicks.  Anyway, while C is getting me a drink he hails me over.  I like to stay friends, after all, it;'s not like I give a shit about him anymore.  "Sorry times are so tough for you."  I am utterly confused and I figure some bitchy rumour going around or whatever.  "Why else would you be slumming."  And he nods at C as he is coming up.  Fuck, what the hell did I see in him?  In fact, now I think the whole group of them are absolute dicks.

So you know me.  I went for ubber sophisticated and refused to stoop to that level of bitchiness.  Yeah right.

"Now at least I know how it's done right."  Slam.  Ouch, that must've hurt that giant ego.

Ok, sometimes I'm evil

But I'm good with that.

At work the other day I am getting a woman's information.  She is one of those who wants to blurt out her information in under 3 seconds and then rolls her eyes that I cannot seem to write or type the information as fast as she can spew it, and unaware that when you talk that fast you are FUCKING mumbling it, bitch.  So I get her  name, ask her to spell it, get her address, go for the email address.  She says it fast "I'm sorry, could you repeat that." There was alot of noise, and she rattled it off like nothing.  So she crosses her arms and glares at me "Praisejesus585@yahoo.ca" (number and service provider wrong), at this time she's got her neck going, pursing her lips, like we are in some kind of a fucking argument.  If looks would kill I'd be typing with rotting fingers.  So Yeah, I went into bitchy mode...
"P-R-A-I-S-E.... what?"
"Jesus," she is practically shouting at this point, and very slowly:)
"Could you spell that for me?"
LOL, I thought her head was gonna explode.

Why are parents always to blame?

   I've read a few blogs lately all pointing to the faulty parenting of others.  I get that there are a lot of bad parents out there.  There are a lot of good parents out there.  But there is an assumption that bad parents have bad children, good parents have good children.  I find that funny, like saying straight parents have straight kids.
   Don't get me wrong, I am not denying that little brats often have overly-indulgent parents who spoil them.  But at some point doesn't that person take control of their lives and make of their life what they will?  Isn't part of growing up to take responsibility and not allow society to blame your parents for everything wrong you do.  "Oh, he came from a broken home" or "his parents never taught him discipline".  I'm sorry, but if you are over the age of 16 it is time to stop blaming your parents.  Especially since we can all do it.  There is no such thing as a calculation for perfect parents, so let us all sit back and blame the over-indulgence, uncaring, alcoholic, absentee, overly intrusive, single, working, emotionally distant, over protective, overly liberal, abusive, non-disciplining, poor, rich.... insert adjective here... parents for not doing right by us.  Yes there are fucked up parents, and then there are assholes out there who will blame perfectly fine parents for everything they have ever done wrong.

I heard a brilliant line the other day I wanted to share, which I guess was kind of what put this in my head.  Someone who had come from a very physically and emotionally abusive home.  "At some point I had to separate  what was done to me, and what I did to myself.  It's the only way to own yourself."

Maybe the problems with the youth of today is that society keeps telling them their triumphs are their own, and their failures are the fault of their parents, society, the government, the times, their friends, the drugs, the environment, the media... But certainly not their own.  Maybe it's time to give kids ownership of their lives, good or bad, they are the ones making the choices.  Own the consequences.

Poke him with a stick

Chris will never admit he is tired.  A night of no sleep will catch up.  He falls asleep on my couch.  Yep, we are at my place, (while the folks are away, hehehe)  because the central air is back up and running.  I can always tell when he is tired, because he gets all physical and acts... well, sweet, although I would never say that to him out loud.  He sees it somehow as a failure if he falls asleep before I do.  Like it's a contest or something.
   So last night I drag him off to bed after nudging him awake.  Of course he was not really sleeping, just closing his eyes for a second.  Dude, you've been snoring for over an hour.  Why is it so hard to admit you were sleeping?  We all need sleep.  Man I can crash out on him for freaking hours and it doesn't bother me.  Why does it seem like bigger men have such egos they gotta feed?

100 Followers

Thank you all!

so what does the boss think of the new place?

He loves carpet.

Bella the Huntress

I feel it only fair that I add a pic of my other darling, the Boss of the house Bella.  After all, I wouldn't want her to read my blog and see pics of Nelson and not her.  And I know she does use my computer when I am not around.  How else would you explain all the porn downloads?

Bella is about the very best hunter in existence.  She kills birds, mice, even went after a bunny once that was in our yard.  She is proof positive that ANYONE who says that Man is the only animal that hunts for enjoyment rather than food has NEVER seen a cat hunt.

The car accident and the ghosts of the past

So C got in a car accident with some guy who was on the phone and BAM t-bones him.  The car is a complete write off.  But I think what pissed C off the most is that the guy did not apologize or say anything to him.  So He pretty much bitched all night about the fact that the blue book value of his car is never going to get him another car....about ass holes driving on cells and well....those two things, but over and over and over again.
 Packing away his bedroom I find a bottle of rye in a boot.  Well, half a bottle.
"SHit, I thought I got all those."
"All what?"
"The hidden bottles."
"Why are you hiding bottles when you live alone?"
"Drunk me knew dry me was not going to get to work if there was half a bottle of booze lying around in the morning.  And drunk me was at least smart enough to figure out that working was important, if only to keep buying booze."
   Wow, that is fucked up.  "you keep it."  Ummm, no.  There is just something a little too weird about that.  Empty that fucker down the sink and keep on packing.  I managed to convince him to come back to my place, where at least the window unit gives some relief to the heat.  The fact that his bed is now in pieces did help a bit.  He is so old fashioned about stupid things.  My parents aren't home so who is going to say anything about him spending the night?
   ANyway, waiting right now on him getting up so we can get started on the big move.

Guess what, ladies, you are not alone

Talking about body image.  now I know women especially are given impossible ideals to live up to.  It seems even the most perfect girl thinks her thighs are too fat, or her nose not right.  In fact, many who have surgery to "correct" these perceived flaws keep going in for more and more procedures, trying to achieve perfection. Sometimes I think that that is becuase no matter how often you look in the mirror you see what you dislike, or what you dislike, even if that has changed.  How a think beautiful girl can always look in the mirror and see a chubby kid with bad skin.  That is me to a tee.  I am still the skinny, loser, geek, reject.
It's not that I don't try.  I work out.  I lift weights.  Nothing helps.  Every day I look in the mirror and nothing changes.  Ali keeps telling me I put on muscle, weight even, but she is totally biased, cause she's my girl.  C says I look good, but he has a vested interest in me wanting to get naked with him... so there you go.
Then today Ali took a pic and I near shit.  I swear to fuck, I see myself in the mirror day to day, but not a big fan of having my picture taken.  But a pic from like 7 months I see every day, in here, so it was probably like seeing someone you haven't seen in seven months suddenly, you see all the changes you don't see in the every day.  I gotta say, I have put on a lot of muscle and some weight.  Shit picture, fucking hotter than hell here, that's my excuse and I am sticking to it.  But it is also the only reason I am wearing this shirt out in public.

Harry Potter and the packing job from hell

Another Harry Potter book.... no fucking way!  Unfortunately, no fucking way.  Ali and a couple friends are going to see Harry Potter tonight.  I have a lot of reasons I said yes.
  1. It`s FUCKING HARRY POTTER!
  2. Air conditioning in my place is not working, so besides an older than me window unit, which works for shit, I am left to sweat out the heat wave until Monday when the part to fix it comes in.  Fuck... Monday.... seriously... So the thought of two plus hours in air conditioned glory is WONDERFUL!
  3.  See reason 1.

Chris is moving into his place on Saturday and Sunday... oh, what a glorious weekend I`m going to have.  But of course that means he is packing the next two nights... and guess who gets to help.  *wince at memories of helping the ex pack and promptly getting dumped*.

``You`re not going to help...really``  Damn, he`s good, like Nonna good at the the guilt.  ``J, it was your idea for me to get out of this shithole.``  Well, duh, reason being it is a shithole.
``I was kidding, alright.... I`m helping you pack.``
``Hey, don`t bother if you don`t want to.``
Who is he kidding, of course I don`t WANT to.  He is on the third floor with no AC.  ``Of course I want to.``
``Fucking liar,`` I can hear him smiling through the phone.  ``I`ll make it up to you.``
``Oh, yes, you will.``

Too fucking hot to breathe

Tomorrow is supposed to be 48 degrees, are you fucking kidding me?  For my american friends, that is 118.4 Fahrenheit 

waxing, sun and new apartments

So I had the bitch from hell replace my usual esthetition , she was just plain MEAN.  Never again.

Beach time was awesome.  Early arrival.... lots of fun.  Driving 4 drunk people back mid afternoon was a riot.  Okay, not really drunk, but a healthy buzz.  Ali was taking photos and did the no no of looking through my pics. A movie she nearly played.  She's such a freak.  Note to self: wipe memory before letting Ali anywhere near my camera.

Chris is apartment hunting.  We saw a place today that was AWESOME!  2 bedrooms, HUGE kitchen, Marble bathroom.  He would be apartment manager in a bad end of town, but only 5 units, so worth it.  He is considering, but I love the place.  Mind you, it's his place. But it is gorgeous!  Wish I could afford an apartment myself.  It would so be mine.

1 job down

Chris finally got into his union!  So he finally gave up his old job.  Making me a very happy man.  No more 80+ hour weeks.  No more excuses for sleeping all day.  He was so worried they would lay him off before getting into the union he kept his old job.  Okay, yeah, he hates his job, but he says welding is welding.  Finishing his tattoo tonight.  So lots of chatting on the phone.  Best boyfriend ever.

The Famous Nelson

Here he is.  Isn't he freaking adorable?  Ignore the crap apartment.

so I've dated me some douche bags-- Party theme

Best party.  There is nothing like a night of loud music, outrageous stories, food, movies and oh yeah, Jello shooters and booze.
Earlier in the day Ali and I go to a sex shop to get the trophy.  The guy ahead of us in line makes us wait forever while he is analyzing the porn movies he is bringing back, versus the new versions he is renting.  Quite the movie critic.  Ali had to walk away three times because she started giggling.  Sadly, she embarrassed me in my fave sex shop:P  So we buy it, go back to hers to finish it off, and finish the party prep.  Total and absolute blast.  The trophy was a cock with the words "Sorry about the douche bag attached" written on it.
   Only one disappointment.  Watched the movie black swan, and I hated it.  But the girls liked it enough.

Marriage

Was at Nonna's for dinner last night.  My cousin came and brought her fiance.  I really don't get the big label of "fiance".  It seems like such a husband in training title.  Like "this is my husband if he doesn't fuck it up over the next few months."  So over the course of the meal he referred to her as the "future Mrs. Walker".  She eyes him like he is joking.  "I'm not changing my name."  I had to laugh.  Oh, you foolish little boy.  My cousin is a very independent soul.  I nearly choked when she announced getting married.  To her changing a name would be like losing part of her identity and an outdated sense of a man's importance over a woman.  How could he not know that?
   "Of course you change your name," Nonna waves it off.  It is how it's done."
   "Not anymore Nonna.  Jamie, would you expect your wife to take your name?"
   "In what universe am I marrying a woman?"
   "Hypothetically, fuck head."
   "Well, I guess it depends on the hypothetical woman.  I don't see anything wrong with it, but I don't think there is anything wrong with keeping your name either."
   "Ugh, Thank you Miss America," disgusted look from her.
   "What happens when you have babies?  They will have a different name than you."  Nonna tries to reason.
   "Why are they getting his name?"
   "Because they will be my children."  Oh foolish man, thinking you had a voice in this discussion.
   "Funny, I thought they would be our children."

Straight marriage is much more complicated than I thought.  Maybe it should just be left to the gays;)

You may have to put your fingers in your ears and hum a tune

So I was dead tired last night. It was around 9, I'm passed out dead in my room. So of course Chris gets off early. He calls:

My eyes barely open :What?

C: Were you sleeping?

Mmmmmm

Never mind go back to sleep

Wake now

He starts laughing : You sure about that?

I was fairly certain it was not that late : you on break

No, done for the day. Wanna come over to my place?

So now I am figuring it is late, usually he gets off at midnight. :so is this like a booty call?

It's only nine, J. I was thinking more like going out, but you don't sound even up for the booty call.
I'm up now.  Not going to the bar though.

So he had a copy of the Green Lantern, which was good... gave him something to do, because I fell back asleep during the opening credits. So forward about two hours later, he wakes me to go to bed and I am wide awake.
It's so freaking hot in his place.  So we strip down and just lay on top of the bed about a foot away from each other, because body contact is only going to make it hotter.  "You still tired?"
   "No," I'm laughing.  "Just hot"
   "too hot?"  Suddenly not too hot, not with him kissing me like he meant business and grinding himself against me.  I've trained him so well he never even attempts anything without a condom anymore.  Stopped bitching about the taste of latex.
so he stops, fuck no, right at the edge "My turn"
oh fuck, yeah!
Never did I think I;d top him
OMG don't get me wrong, I love bottoming, but c has bottomed oncebefore.
He asked me to top him
that is HUGE!
You sure
yeah, baby]
OMFG best night ever!
So after: won't your parerts worry?  you alone?
No, they will hapy I am not with some one inappreropiate.
in appropriate is?
someone not white, chrisian, and female
so I am a HUGH fail
Like epic.
No, just epic

have not stopped smiling since

I love Pride

I had the best time ever. My liver is no longer speaking to me, and I feel like ass 2 days later, but FUCK did I ever have fun. C ended up coming! It was the awesomest time ever. Funniest thing ever, T's neighbours are super phobic. They would sit on their patio and bitch loudly about the "queers, fags and dykes". How little of a life do you have to have to care who is fucking who? Really? Okay, I am prejudice, if you are phobic I think you need to laid enough to care more about your sex life than mine. Just saying....

Yes, money

Eight hours yesterday at time and a half, then another four at double time. I love holidays:) Today I leave for toronto. My friends are picking me up at union station. I am hung over, HUGE! Yesterday while I was slaving away at work Ali and her bf took a road trip to Dunnville for booze. Awesome! I love that we can get booze even on holidays. Ali bought some rum for me. I love her, but this morning I hate her. Damn that thoughtful bitch.

C's dropping me off at the bus station. He decided against going camping. Yeah, I'm feeling a bit guilty, but fuck it all, it's Toronto Pride. The next long weekend I will go where ever he wants, but Pride is my thing, even if he doesn't get it.

So.... around 12 hours from now I will be hammered in a bar in Toronto, but for equality, dammit;)