Saturday, July 9, 2011


Was at Nonna's for dinner last night.  My cousin came and brought her fiance.  I really don't get the big label of "fiance".  It seems like such a husband in training title.  Like "this is my husband if he doesn't fuck it up over the next few months."  So over the course of the meal he referred to her as the "future Mrs. Walker".  She eyes him like he is joking.  "I'm not changing my name."  I had to laugh.  Oh, you foolish little boy.  My cousin is a very independent soul.  I nearly choked when she announced getting married.  To her changing a name would be like losing part of her identity and an outdated sense of a man's importance over a woman.  How could he not know that?
   "Of course you change your name," Nonna waves it off.  It is how it's done."
   "Not anymore Nonna.  Jamie, would you expect your wife to take your name?"
   "In what universe am I marrying a woman?"
   "Hypothetically, fuck head."
   "Well, I guess it depends on the hypothetical woman.  I don't see anything wrong with it, but I don't think there is anything wrong with keeping your name either."
   "Ugh, Thank you Miss America," disgusted look from her.
   "What happens when you have babies?  They will have a different name than you."  Nonna tries to reason.
   "Why are they getting his name?"
   "Because they will be my children."  Oh foolish man, thinking you had a voice in this discussion.
   "Funny, I thought they would be our children."

Straight marriage is much more complicated than I thought.  Maybe it should just be left to the gays;)


  1. I told you, heterosexual marriages are overrated.
    It does not pay to be teetering on normal boundaries these days! haha
    Best wishes though for the couple-to-be!
    I ♥ Nonna.
    P.S. Can you believe that? Your capcha says: mensings ...lmao!

  2. And people wonder why I never wanted to do it.

    Yeah, independence is the way forward.
    Unless of course Mr Diesel comes to his senses.

  3. okay. since i was a fetus, i was anti-marriage. i think traditionally, it's an archaic and outdated event, with these bullshit religious orders about ownership and obeying, and etc, etc.
    but as an adult [i'm finally admitting this aloud...] i think that people declaring their love in a service with community, and loved ones is okay. if the people are mature grown adults, not impulsive twats, like most.
    i actually would get married, but it would be very unique to us & personal, like each relationship is.
    and as far as taking names goes- fuck that.
    i have a couple of hetero friends who both changes their names to one they made up. i thought that was very progressive and cool. and know a homosexual-male couple who hyphenated their names, taking each others' as an after thought. that way they are still "joe blow" but now it's "joe blow-job", and "jack job-blow" for example.

    at the end of the day- we all do what we want. and who really cares about this shit? it's better to have healthy satisfying relationships that squabble @ last names. unless you plan on winning a nobel prize or publishing the next classic novel- nobody fucking remembers you when you're dead anyhow!!!

  4. well, we hyphenated our name, b/c i wasn't letting it go and neither was papi :)